I just found puke in my bra..
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
