You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
