Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize