If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
You've changed since you got that strap on
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize