Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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