She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
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