you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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