Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Let's get the cat blown out
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I need water and some morals
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
