At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
