So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize