And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
