God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
is it fun? or sober?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize