Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
