We're facebook friends in real life
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
