...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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