she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
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