they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
