I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
