your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
