So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came in the potted fern
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize