yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Randomize
