The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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