my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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