she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Randomize
