Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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