she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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