Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
