so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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