another moral hangover. fuck.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
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