I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
