whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
