We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
