please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
