youre lurking in front of me
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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