WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
