I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Do you remember whose house we're in?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
