But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
do herpes really smell.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize
