3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i think i have herpe
just one?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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