is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
