i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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