ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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