Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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