Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Randomize
