dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize