Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
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