yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I wear drunk well.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
