is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I see more hoeing in ur future
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