I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
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