I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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