Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Where is the hickey?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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