How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
