how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
